We forget the power of an act of kindness. Every moment, one person has the ability to change the trajectory of another’s life. Mary Higgins Clark was a best selling author, a role model and an inspiration. This is the story of how one request, one day and a cup of tea changed my life.
On November 11, 2010, I felt my soul officially come back to life when I found myself sitting next to my cousin Laury at the home office of Mary Higgins Clark in Saddle River, New Jersey. Mary was pouring us a cup of tea as she described the purpose of the piles of paper on the floor beside her desk, which would soon become her forty-first book, titled I’ll Walk Alone.” As she set down the tea pot, she held up two book covers, one with a red background and one with fuchsia. I sat on the small settee in Mary’s loft office in complete amazement as she asked us, “Which do you like better?” We both replied in unison, “The red one.” Mary laughed and decried, “Red it is.” I was dumbfounded as to how Laury and I, newly self-proclaimed authors, found ourselves sitting in this amazing office overlooking the snowcapped forest, having tea with Mary Higgins Clark. The only explanation was that my mother’s bold, unending love was sending me signs from heaven, convincing me that she was watching over me. My doubts were so big that they required big signs from heaven. As celestial doors began to open, I came alive again, and the gigantic crater in my heart that had existed since Mom’s passing on December 18, 2007, filled.
Mom’s passing was the worst thing that ever happened to me. She was my rock, my best friend, and my biggest fan. I was lucky enough to know unconditional love my whole life. When she suddenly passed away, I felt lost, terrified, and lonely.
Me and my Mom - 2006
Although I was surrounded by my husband, my children, my best friend, and my family, I felt completely alone. I was going through the motions and faking it. With two amazing kids and a great husband, I had all the trappings of a perfect life. I had a demanding, fulfilling career, but I spent the next year in a haze. By all appearances, I was coping. Even though I made it a priority for my kids to be fine and for my career to be successful, deep down, I was broken. At night, my mind drifted to how much better it would be if I could just die and be with my mom. Grief was deep in my thoughts, and every happy occasion was punctuated by a cloud of despair. I could see the despair. I could feel the despair. The thick cloud choked me. I knew in which moments I was supposed to feel joy and gratefulness, but my emotions were foggy, just out of touch.
The fog stayed with me for well over a year. It was a secret that only my best friend Debbie shared. The idea of a good night’s sleep was a fond memory from the past. I found myself rising earlier every day and beginning to write. Laury and I had this idea for a book celebrating strong women with a connection to Ireland. Our grandmother and my mother were the strongest women we knew. As cousins, we both attributed our successes in life to our Irish upbringing. Our grandmother Peggy Prendergast lived to be ninety-five, immigrated to the United States in 1930, and never forgot she was Irish. She created a little Irish family in the middle of the desert in El Paso, Texas, where she retired.
Laury and I came up with the idea to find other women who felt the same way as we did about their Irish connection. But how could we find them? They were few and far between in Texas. One early morning, at 4:30 a.m., I was literally staring at my computer as I asked the question in my mind, “Mom, how do I find people who love Ireland like we do?” I distinctively heard Mom’s voice respond, “Find Jane Treacy (https://www.instagram.com/janetreacyqvc/?hl=en) on QVC. She will help you.” Was I losing my mind? But Mom and I were proud QVC Queens, big fans of the annual St. Patrick’s Day program that Jane started, so I obediently typed www.qvc.com into the web browser and scrolled to the bottom of the page. There was Jane Treacy’s email address, so I simply drafted an email to her. I waited. Two days later, Jane Treacy emailed me back: “I would be honored to be part of your book. When will you be in Philadelphia?”
QVC Here I come!
Cousins and co-authors
We immediately set up the meeting. Within days, I found myself at QVC sitting next to Jane Treacy, who I had loved and admired from afar for so many years. During the interview, she suggested that Mary Higgins Clark would be a great fit for the book. I called Laury; we went to work to find a contact email for her. Jane was right: Mary was thrilled and immediately invited us to her home in New Jersey for the interview.
Our day in Mary’s home was life changing. She described her connection to her mother, who had helped her raise her children while she pursued her dream of becoming an author. Since this was so eerily parallel to my own experience, I knew that I was meant to meet this angel. Mary spoke of how to channel tragedy and sadness in life to make a difference. How to never give up in spite of the challenges going on around you. How to enjoy every minute of the good times in life because another day is never guaranteed. That is what the Irish do. That is part of our connection.
Mary Higgins Clark confirmed that her main character in every book is a strong Irish woman. “That is what I know, and that is my truth.” Mary shared her story of rejection when she first submitted her stories at the tender age of fourteen and how the rejection fueled her purpose:
Quote by Mary Higgins Clark from our book WISE IRISH WOMEN
“My faith in my eventual success wasn’t dashed even when I got rejected. When I was 14, I sent some of my poems to the St. Joseph’s Orphan Home in Jersey City and got the most beautiful rejection letter it’s possible to get. I’ve kept it all these years and now it’s framed and hanging in my home.”
Mary Higgins Clark squeezing in her writing at the kitchen table.
AFTERNOON IRISH TEA
is good for the soul.
That delightful afternoon together was both serendipitous and inspirational. Thanks to Mary’s support, our book Wise Irish Women has become a best seller, enjoyed by women with a connection to Ireland from around the world. Wise Irish Women brought my cousin and me closer; we have a bond that will never end. Like Mary, I officially claimed my dream of becoming an author and silenced the negative doubts in my head. Like her, I write what I know and have recently completed my second book, The B Words. 13 Words Women Must Navigate for Success.
Over a cup of tea in a beautiful home in Saddle River, New Jersey, Mary Higgins Clark brought my soul back to life. Her gracious generosity of her time with two would-be authors from Texas changed my life and gave me the strength to let go of the pain of loss. As I sat with my teacup chatting with Laury and Mary, I knew the foggy weight of sadness that had darkened the joyous moments in my life since my mom had passed was finally lifting. I saw life in full color again. I was an author, and I had a purpose. I would survive, and I would make a difference. I would inspire others to pursue their dreams and overcome their grief. Above all, I would embrace each and every day on this planet, even the saddest, darkest ones.
Available
September 15, 2020
My mother always told me as a I was growing up, “You make a difference in the world by changing your little corner of the world.” Mary made a difference in the world by sharing her words and talents across every nation and weaving words together to tell amazing stories. This inspirational woman made a difference by sharing her story over a cup of tea.
Thank you, Mary Higgins Clark, for making a difference and sharing your corner of the world in Wise Irish Women. You will be missed―I know you will be watching over us.
Slainte