Real Women Living the B Words

My latest book, The B Words; 13 Words Women Must Navigate for Success will be released on September 15, 2020! (Pre-Order here https://amzn.to/2NnOP3g) I'm so excited for it to be out there in the world finally. While researching the book, I had the opportunity to meet many extraordinary women, each one more than willing to share their stories to support other women.  My publisher recently asked me to describe some women I admire who are living the principles outlined in The B Words.

Today I would like to introduce you to the amazing and talented Lucy Cruz. I have known Lucy for more than 20 years, and I have had the opportunity to watch her grow as she continuously strives for excellence for herself and her family.

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Lucy Cruz

Everman ISD Teacher of the Year Candidate 2020

Lucy Cruz was recently nominated as Teacher of the Year award for the Everman ISD in Fort Worth, Texas. As a Mexican immigrant, the world did not expect Lucy to be a Teacher, much less receive her Master's Degree in Education and land a job designing Spanish curriculum for the entire school district. The path for Mexican immigrants has historically been a limited one. Yet something inside of Lucy planned for more. Lucy's life work is to be an advocate for the children in the shadows of our school systems. As someone who greatly benefited from the bilingual education program in her high school, where she immigrated at 14 and learned English, Lucy understands the key to tolerance, acceptance, and grace is achieved through language.  Lucy explains, “When children learn a second language, they learn so much more than words. They learn culture and communication. Speaking another language shapes the way people think and navigate in the world.”  Lucy is far more than a teacher. She is on a mission to break down the preconceived notions and limitations of Hispanic immigrants and open the future to teach respect tolerance and grace through language. 

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Beliefs

are never neutral. They either propel you forward or hold you back.

Lucy lives the essence of the 1st B Word  Beliefs. Beliefs are never neutral. They either move you forward or hold you back.  Prohibition deals with limiting beliefs held by society.  Inhibition is what we tell ourselves that holds us hostage from taking a step forward toward our dream. 

As a Mexican immigrant in the United States, Lucy has had to face prohibition and barriers where society attempted to define her. Despite society's expectations of her, Lucy continues to charge forward, breaking down barriers and has become a role model for Hispanic Women to live your dreams and never, ever give up. 


TK:  Describe your journey to the United States and what its like as a Hispanic Immigrant.

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LC:  I am what Americans refer to as an "Anchor Baby." Back in the 1970s, the world at the Texas border was very different. People crossed freely back and forth to work, shop, and in my mother's case, have a  baby. My mother and father lived in the border town of Matamoros, Mexico. My father encouraged my mother to give birth to me in the United States. He believed that one day having my American Citizenship would be of great benefit. So a few days before I was due, my mother took a 5-mile drive across the bridge and gave birth to me at a midwife's house in Brownsville, Texas. In today's politically charged immigration world, this sounds crazy, but 40 years ago, this was a daily occurrence. The border was not politically charged and polarized at that time. My father was right about the impact the decision had on my life. It was a life-changing decision that opened doors for me, my family, and my future.

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At three days old, my mother and I drove back across the bridge into Matamoros, Mexico. I spent my childhood there until the age of 14 when my father and mother got divorced. With a strong desire to start anew, my mother made the familiar 5-mile drive yet again across the border. We had a suitcase and $100 to our name. We did not own a car. My mother, brother, and I got a ride to the USA from a friend.  My creative mother did many odd jobs. She sewed clothes, sold Mexican cokes and cheese. Whatever it took to keep us together. Somehow she was able to rent a small mother in-law apartment. Her mission was to provide her children with a better life and a good education.


TK: What was it like going to high school in a new country with a new language?

 LC: I will never forget my first day of high school. My mother and I did not speak a word of English. As a Freshman at 14 years old, I remember entering the office and feeling overwhelmed with the paperwork and the flurry of people and activity going on around me while I could not understand a single word.  I finally settled into the ESL (English as a Second Language) classroom where all the kids that could not speak English end up. Most were like me. They had come across the border and were trying to figure it all out. My first ESL Teacher became a life-changing blessing in my life. She spoke to me in my native language, explained to me what was going on, and helped me find my way. I think back on that time in my life and realize that my first Teacher is the reason I decided to go back to school at 36 years old to obtain my teaching degree and become a bilingual education teacher.

 I learned to speak, read, and write the fundamentals of the English language during my high school years. I even passed the English Fundamentals exam and graduated from high school, but I never really grasped or felt comfortable with the English language. As an immigrant, the school was a difficult place. The majority of the school population was Hispanic, but there was a divided line between native-born Americans and those like me, immigrants. We all looked the same, but we were worlds apart. 

 

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Mr. & Mrs. Jesus Cruz

USA here we come…


TK:  Where did life take you after you graduated from high school?

LC:  After graduating from high school, I moved back to Mexico, where I met my husband. At 20 years old, Jesus and I got married and decided to drive back across that bridge and start a life in the United States.  We set out to do what was expected of us in the United States as Hispanic immigrants. Jesus applied for work as a construction laborer, and I planned to clean houses. As I was searching for a cleaning job, a friend pointed out to me that my citizenship and my high school education provided me with other opportunities that I never considered for myself. She encouraged me to apply for a job at Child Incorporated as a Teachers Aid. To my absolute astonishment, I got the job.  

Jesus and I saved our money, bought a mobile home, and I had my first son. I applied for a job at a daycare in a Lutheran church. All of the parents were American, and that is where I finally mastered the English language. I had to speak it, read it and write it. My confidence and my English abilities continued to grow.


TK: What was the catalyst for you to pursue your degree? 

LC: As a daycare teacher for ten years, I realized my passion for education but never really believed that I could go back to college to get my degree. It was not something I thought of for myself.  One day during a run with a good friend, we both decided that we should apply to go back to college. That afternoon, at 36 years old with two teenagers at home, I enrolled and never looked back. I received my Bachelor's degree in Spanish with secondary certification and immediately went on to get my Masters Degree . I took my future in my own hands and became a role model for my children. We all studied at the same time. We set goals for ourselves and our futures.  


TK:  What are your thoughts on diversity and inclusion for the Hispanic community in the United States today? 

LC: I believe we can do better. The COVID-19 situation is a stark reminder that while we may look different, we are all the same. We are all human. Our society has some work to do in the area of inclusion and diversity, and change starts with our youth.  Our young Hispanic females need role models to show them that they can do anything they set their minds to. Our schools need leadership and support to encourage the celebration and acceptance of our differences. We all have a story and a history. Celebrating culture and diversity changes the world for the better through awareness, which leads to tolerance and, ultimately, acceptance and respect.


 TK: Your mission is to encourage all school districts to promote multilingualism, provide world readiness instruction, and prepare students to connect and communicate in the multicultural world. What are the benefits for children learning another language in school? 

LC:  I know first-hand the power of bilingualism.  Being bilingual is a Super Power. Educators can build bilingual global educated citizens capable of reaching their academic and personal dreams. Learning another language benefits students in three ways, academically, neurologically, and culturally.

  • Academically - Language and communication are fundamental to human communication skills. Dual language students gain another perspective providing a better understanding of themselves and others. Studies show improved cognitive function, higher academic achievement, and increased social and emotional skills. 

  • Neurologically – Scientific studies show that learning a new language creates growth in the cerebral gray matter in the brain. More knowledge makes students smarter. 

  • Culturally –  Learning another language naturally creates respect and appreciation for other cultures. The world takes on a more significant footprint as students recognize a much more substantial influence as they explore their place in the world. 

As a bilingual woman, I can testify to all these benefits. Before learning English, I was shy and timid. As my English knowledge base grew, so did my confidence. At 37 years of age, I studied abroad for the first time with a group of monolingual peers. My bilingual ability and expectations of cultural diversity provided me with the confidence to readily interact with the local community and take part in the conversation in their language. Some of my monolingual peers were uncomfortable and would not take the risk to embrace the experience. 

The world is far more than one language and one culture. I'm dedicating my career to showing my students the beauty of diversity and the courage to embrace their culture and celebrate their differences. We no longer have to be defined by antiquated, outdated societal beliefs. I'm an example of someone who dared to believe in my dream of becoming a bi-lingual teacher. Now I design the bilingual curriculum for the entire school district.  My advice is to never allow someone else to define your self-worth.  Keep going and use your time on this earth wisely. Believe in yourself and have faith in your dreams. 

Never allow someone else to define your self-worth.  Keep going and use your time on this earth wisely. Believe in yourself and have faith in your dreams. 
— Lucy Cruz
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The Cruz Family

Making a difference in their corner of the world


Want to be featured on my blog? I would love to hear your story.

Contact me at tricia@triciakagerer.com

Our Day with Mary Higgins Clark

On November 11, 2010, I felt my soul officially come back to life when I found myself sitting next to my cousin Laury at the home office of Mary Higgins Clark in Saddle River, New Jersey. Mary was pouring us a cup of tea as she described the purpose of the piles of paper on the floor beside her desk, which would soon become her forty-first book, titled I’ll Walk Alone.” As she set down the tea pot, she held up two book covers, one with a red background and one with fuchsia. I sat on the small settee in Mary’s loft office in complete amazement as she asked us, “Which do you like better?”  We both replied in unison, “The red one.” Mary laughed and decried, “Red it is.” I was dumbfounded as to how Laury and I, newly self-proclaimed authors, found ourselves sitting in this amazing office overlooking the snowcapped forest, having tea with Mary Higgins Clark. The only explanation was that my mother’s bold, unending love was sending me signs from heaven, convincing me that she was watching over me. My doubts were so big that they required big signs from heaven. As celestial doors began to open, I came alive again, and the gigantic crater in my heart that had existed since Mom’s passing on December 18, 2007, filled.

Mom’s passing was the worst thing that ever happened to me. She was my rock, my best friend, and my biggest fan. I was lucky enough to know unconditional love my whole life. When she suddenly passed away, I felt lost, terrified, and lonely.

Me and my Mom - 2006

Me and my Mom - 2006

Although I was surrounded by my husband, my children, my best friend, and my family, I felt completely alone. I was going through the motions and faking it. With two amazing kids and a great husband, I had all the trappings of a perfect life. I had a demanding, fulfilling career, but I spent the next year in a haze. By all appearances, I was coping. Even though I made it a priority for my kids to be fine and for my career to be successful, deep down, I was broken. At night, my mind drifted to how much better it would be if I could just die and be with my mom. Grief was deep in my thoughts, and every happy occasion was punctuated by a cloud of despair. I could see the despair. I could feel the despair. The thick cloud choked me. I knew in which moments I was supposed to feel joy and gratefulness, but my emotions were foggy, just out of touch.  

The fog stayed with me for well over a year. It was a secret that only my best friend Debbie shared. The idea of a good night’s sleep was a fond memory from the past. I found myself rising earlier every day and beginning to write. Laury and I had this idea for a book celebrating strong women with a connection to Ireland. Our grandmother and my mother were the strongest women we knew. As cousins, we both attributed our successes in life to our Irish upbringing. Our grandmother Peggy Prendergast lived to be ninety-five, immigrated to the United States in 1930, and never forgot she was Irish. She created a little Irish family in the middle of the desert in El Paso, Texas, where she retired.

Laury and I came up with the idea to find other women who felt the same way as we did about their Irish connection. But how could we find them? They were few and far between in Texas. One early morning, at 4:30 a.m., I was literally staring at my computer as I asked the question in my mind, “Mom, how do I find people who love Ireland like we do?” I distinctively heard Mom’s voice respond, “Find Jane Treacy (https://www.instagram.com/janetreacyqvc/?hl=en) on QVC. She will help you.” Was I losing my mind? But Mom and I were proud QVC Queens, big fans of the annual St. Patrick’s Day program that Jane started, so I obediently typed www.qvc.com into the web browser and scrolled to the bottom of the page. There was Jane Treacy’s email address, so I simply drafted an email to her. I waited. Two days later, Jane Treacy emailed me back: “I would be honored to be part of your book. When will you be in Philadelphia?”

QVC Here I come!

QVC Here I come!

Cousins and co-authors

Cousins and co-authors

We immediately set up the meeting. Within days, I found myself at QVC sitting next to Jane Treacy, who I had loved and admired from afar for so many years. During the interview, she suggested that Mary Higgins Clark would be a great fit for the book. I called Laury; we went to work to find a contact email for her. Jane was right: Mary was thrilled and immediately invited us to her home in New Jersey for the interview.

Our day in Mary’s home was life changing. She described her connection to her mother, who had helped her raise her children while she pursued her dream of becoming an author. Since this was so eerily parallel to my own experience, I knew that I was meant to meet this angel. Mary spoke of how to channel tragedy and sadness in life to make a difference. How to never give up in spite of the challenges going on around you. How to enjoy every minute of the good times in life because another day is never guaranteed. That is what the Irish do. That is part of our connection.

Mary Higgins Clark confirmed that her main character in every book is a strong Irish woman. “That is what I know, and that is my truth.” Mary shared her story of rejection when she first submitted her stories at the tender age of fourteen and how the rejection fueled her purpose:

Quote by Mary Higgins Clark from our book WISE IRISH WOMEN

My faith in my eventual success wasn’t dashed even when I got rejected. When I was 14, I sent some of my poems to the St. Joseph’s Orphan Home in Jersey City and got the most beautiful rejection letter it’s possible to get. I’ve kept it all these years and now it’s framed and hanging in my home.”

Mary’s first rejection letter at 14 years old
Mary Higgins Clark squeezing in her writing at the kitchen table.

Mary Higgins Clark squeezing in her writing at the kitchen table.

Irish Tea Set

AFTERNOON IRISH TEA

is good for the soul.

That delightful afternoon together was both serendipitous and inspirational. Thanks to Mary’s support, our book Wise Irish Women has become a best seller, enjoyed by women with a connection to Ireland from around the world. Wise Irish Women brought my cousin and me closer; we have a bond that will never end. Like Mary, I officially claimed my dream of becoming an author and silenced the negative doubts in my head. Like her, I write what I know and have recently completed my second book, The B Words. 13 Words Women Must Navigate for Success.

Over a cup of tea in a beautiful home in Saddle River, New Jersey, Mary Higgins Clark brought my soul back to life. Her gracious generosity of her time with two would-be authors from Texas changed my life and gave me the strength to let go of the pain of loss. As I sat with my teacup chatting with Laury and Mary, I knew the foggy weight of sadness that had darkened the joyous moments in my life since my mom had passed was finally lifting. I saw life in full color again. I was an author, and I had a purpose. I would survive, and I would make a difference. I would inspire others to pursue their dreams and overcome their grief. Above all, I would embrace each and every day on this planet, even the saddest, darkest ones. 

Available September 15, 2020

Pre Order Now!

My mother always told me as a I was growing up, “You make a difference in the world by changing your little corner of the world.” Mary made a difference in the world by sharing her words and talents across every nation and weaving words together to tell amazing stories. This inspirational woman made a difference by sharing her story over a cup of tea.

Thank you, Mary Higgins Clark, for making a difference and sharing your corner of the world in Wise Irish Women. You will be missed―I know you will be watching over us.

Slainte